First off, its been a while since I wrote. I hope everyone is doing well! 2020. Whew. What a year. A year of big changes and lessons. We needed this.…
2020 the year of big changes
2020 the year of big changes
First off, its been a while since I wrote. I hope everyone is doing well!
2020. Whew. What a year. A year of big changes and lessons. We needed this. We needed to get rocked off our asses and wake up. Again, what. A. Year. In astrology, we had six planets that were all retrograde. I think the world is really feeling that. Recently got out of Venus Retrograde but will still feel the aftermath until end of July. Relationships were definitely being put to the test. Now you may have been thinking, this year has really sucked. So many bad things have happen but look at it this way. This pandemic, COVID-19, taught us not to take things for granted, (shopping, family/friends, schools, work, etc). Homeschooling the last part of the year was tough. Teachers need to get paid more, bottom line. Most of us are tired of staying home but please stay home! We had a big spike recently and it is such a shame. I want to send my kids back to school in August but I have my concerns. Being stuck at home gives us time for reflection, soul growth, learning. I can say for me personally, before I was go go go. These past few months I have had time for myself. While it also has not been easy for me, more of the good outweighs the bad. I think 2020 has been very hard on empaths. We are feeling the chaos, we are feeling the stress, depression, anxiety of society and on top of that all of the crazy planets in retrograde. I have to remind myself daily that I need to ground, do some breath work and set boundaries. Gratitude. We all need a little more of it. We use to go to stores and not have to worry about face masks or if the store is out of toilet paper. Now I don’t leave the house without my mask and sanitizer. I do limit what I see on the news since the media likes to hype up everything, instilling fear in all of us. Being an empath anyway, I am always aware of my surroundings. The black community and police officers. My heart go out to both parties. I am angry that the black community have not treated fair. I am happy that they are (finally) being heard. I hope that changes will happen and continue to happen. Black. Lives. Matter. Does that saying annoy you? Get over it. I am tired of people saying All Lives Matter. Of course they do BUT the white community does not face the same type of discrimination. No one is saying your life isn’t important. The black community are continuously treated unfairly, that is a problem. As for police officers, they are NOT ALL BAD. I pray for the officers in blue during this time of change. It is very scary to be a police officer right now. I pray the world heals and love outweighs the hatred. Their has to be darkness in order for light. This has been that type of year. The changes we will gradually see will be worth it. We needed this change. Continue to spread love and spread your light. The world desperately needs it right now my dear lightworkers. Xo
Moon sign- emotions & empaths
Most of us know our sun sign. Whatever month you were born in you can easily find out but do you know that is just a small part of who you are? Take a deeper look. ESPECIALLY for empaths and how you let your emotions control you. My sun sign is Cancer, your sun sign is your ego. My moon sign is Pisces, your moon sign is your emotions.
Cancer and Pisces is very watery. Very emotional. Very psychic, compassionate, secretive, sensitive, dreamy, guarded. Pisces moon is very influenced by emotions of others. Sometimes we get stuck in our own heads, we feel trapped and feel like we are drowning in our watery mess. I truly feel for Pisces moon as I feel like it might be the most emotional of the zodiac. Especially empaths who are so sensitive as it is.
Examples of some celebrities who had Pisces moon in their natal chart: Michael Jackson & Robin Williams. They had a very hard times, especially during the end of their lives. I could probably guarantee they were both sensitives. Kim Kardashian and her husband Kanye are both Pisces moon. I don’t keep up with them (literally) but as far as I can tell, it does seem like Kanye has trouble at time with his emotions. Kim seems to have a better grip on them.
Want a better understanding of yourself? Look up your moon sign. Learn about yourself. I will post a link below to help you look it up. It is free to look this up. You will need the approximate time of birth and this is very important as the planets are constantly changing so an 8 am birthday could be different then an 8 pm birthday in our cosmos.
I would love to hear what moon sign you are. Thanks for reading!
Oh, hello spirit!
Its been a while since I wrote. This past year has had some ups and downs and I am starting to focus to get back on track with everything. The move has caused a lot of stress. I was a MESS! I was losing my hair and managed to put on 25 pds, good times. I have managed to lose 7 pds so far and I am putting the focus back into myself. It is slowly getting better although I am incredibly lonely. I miss friends and especially family.
So how is 2020 treating you so far?
So my title, hello spirit. This past week, spirit has been whispering into my ear. A lot! More then the past few months and I suppose its because I am working on myself again. Anyway, when spirit decides to chat at it me, it happens during the in between state when you are not quite asleep but about to fall into that sleep state. I’ve heard my name 3 times. The first time it was my full name, Becky! The second time I actually woke up hearing the end of my name ky! The third time I hear, Becky can you… (and that was it). I also heard, Mom! Spirit has really been trying to get my attention. My intuition & spirit usually connect to me by signs, numbers, animals. Sometimes I will just get a thought that pops in my head for no reason. How do you connect?
Why people continually let us down
Why do we let people continually let us down over and over again? Especially if their behavior has always remained consistent with their actions. We hope people will change. We hope people will give a damn. We always hope to see the best in someone only to hurt ourselves in the end.
It hurts my soul that I can not connect to my father as much as I would like to. We have had a very difficult relationship for as long as I can remember, yet, I continually get let down over and over again. Why do I do this to myself? I know it is not me. I know he has his issues and I’ve never felt close to him.
I am far from perfect and have been trying to work on my wounds this year. Healing and releasing this wound has not been easy and I struggle with it daily. Maybe certain people are not meant to be in your daily life or maybe we can just love them from afar. Whatever is meant to be, I’m struggling.
xo
Waking up to awareness
Y’all….I’m a Texan now so I can say that! Hahah. It’s been awhile since I’ve written. If you have followed my others posts we straight up moved from Delaware to Texas and I love it here! Something about southern hospitality and people helping people. It’s so different here then the east coast.
How many of you have had a “wtf” year?? It’s been a heck of a ride this year. So many of you are waking up to being “sensitive” or simply put, an empath.
Why is this happening? Why have you always felt alone or depressed? Simply put…we are here to change the world. I believe things are changing but we as a whole need to step up and embrace it. I really should rename my blog, Messy Empath. Half the time, I don’t know what the heck is happening, who I’m picking up or what the frig this ache or pain is related to. Could it be me or the guy I’m next to. How do you tell? Do you blame on others or own up to your aches/pains. Saging, or using sage oil, walking bare foot in the grass or simply put as “grounding” is the quickest way to figure that out. Also- journaling or blogging is a great start.
Going to crowded areas- my eyes water like crazy. Being around stressed out peeps- shoulders ache like something awful. Female energy- I will feel tingles in my left calf. Male energy- right calf. My husband, currently under a whole lot of stress. I can feel his active brain every night while we turn off the lights and go to bed…and I can’t sleep because of it. We joke about it now but even though he will be laying there, quiet, he feels soooo loud and I have a hard time falling asleep because of it. Just a few examples for you. I started writing them down and really paying attention to how I feel. I highly suggest you do the same, pay attention! It will help you have less wtf moments. I also highly suggest the book- Feelings Buried Alive Never Die. OR buy the app for your phone, I think it’s $5. Anyway- There is a section in the book of ailments and what the meaning behind it is. For example- when I feel pain in my shoulders from people, looking up shoulders in the book, the first symptom of shoulder pain is “bearing burdens that don’t belong to you.”
Yes, being sensitive can be a difficult journey but we are here to help others get back in touch with humanity. Change the negative into a positive. Is this an awful gift? Not really. Trying to control it is difficult but picking up on others, being a human lie detector, helping others when you feel the sadness. We are here to change the world. You were picked to help the change and yes, you are a f’n rockstar! Have a blessed day, y’all!! Xo
One chapter closes…
This summer has been incredibly emotional for my family. In June, my husband, who works at a refinery over here on the east coast had a huge fire. A week later, over 700 employees from that company would find out via the internet/news channel that the refinery would be closing. Many hours later after the initial news broke, the company confirmed. I will not name this company but you may have already googled or have heard of this story already. The company had filed bankruptcy recently and if I am speaking honestly, we were worried before it went up in flames (pun intended). His union contract would be up in September and we were already hearing a lot of discussion of what the company wanted to take away from the workers.
Panic mode. Now over 700 people, who would be out of work by the end of August, would be looking for jobs. With a little inside help, my husbands impressive resume and god on our side, he landed a job in Texas. Holy shit. We are moving to Texas! Lemme back up just a bit- I’ve lived on the east coast, Delaware to be exact, my whole 30 something years on this planet. This summer has been the most challenging time of my life thus far. While I have tried to remain optimistic, hopeful, excited about our new adventure, I have been going through some of the darker emotions a little bit more. Guilt. Sadness. Leaving my family behind. My parents who are getting older. My dad recently having some health issues and possibly a bigger issue, which we will find out this week. Wanting to be excited but feeling guilty of the excitement while my family mourns the loss of me being near. My parents, who I love dearly, never a big emotional support system for me. This summer, I have felt more alone, then I will probably ever feel in Texas. One of my biggest fears, losing my parents. I know God’s lesson in all this is for me to feel ok without having my parents & sister near me. That I can be strong on my own. Let me repeat that….that I CAN be strong on my own and that it is ok for me to live & go forward in my own life and not have to worry about everyone else’s needs. I have always put others first. This move will force me to focus on myself for once, which has been long overdue. Thanks for reading and hey!-the next time I write, I may be a Texan. Later y’all ;). Xo
Spirit
As Empaths, we “feel” more then any other ability out there. A little background-the past few months have been a little tough on all of us as we are relocating from the east coast to the southwest.
My son, 13 1/2, is taking it pretty hard (leaving his friends, changing schools) and has been wanting to sleep in my room with me. I’ve been allowing it as I believe to nuture and protect as much as possible, classic Cancer, lol. Both of my sons are sensitive also. Lately, my eldest has been having more nightmares which is another reason he is wanting to feel protected and asks to sleep in my room.
Anyway, last night. Both of my kiddos in my room (hubby has midnight shift work and not home), made it extremely hard for me to fall asleep. Tons of energy swirling around. Fell asleep around midnight only to wake up at 3:30. Tossed and turned for over an hour. Finally gave up and took my stuff to sleep in my oldest’s room as I feared I kept stirring the kids by tossing and turning. Took a sleeping pill and fell asleep in about a 1/2 hour. So I am asleep in my sons room (who has been having the nightmares) and hear a whisper in my ear (which sounds exactly like an Amazon Alexa). “You have a spirit in your room” and then waking up from sleeping on my right side I felt like something was pushing me down, holding me in place. I screamed “NO” and “GET OFF ME” and managed to run out of “C’s” room and back into my room. I’m not a fan of things messing with me while I sleep. Needless to say, I saged my whole home and set my boundaries yet again. Spirit is not allowed to bother me while I sleep. I want to see spirit & hear spirit but when spirit touches me its kinda freaky, although, that is an empaths first ability. I am trying to learn how to not be scared of spirit but I don’t like things bothering me in the middle of the night at the witching hour, ya know?
* Side note- I do not believe it was astral travel. Especially since I heard a voice.
Anywho- Do you see, hear, feel spirit? Would love to hear other stories. Have a great day and thanks for reading!! xo
Your “roots”
Lets talk on family for a bit. A little on how you were raised. I am thinking this is sort of a pattern for us empaths.
I grew up in a suburban home with my sister, both my parents and always a fuzzy (dog) friend. My dad worked, a lot. He was on shift work and would be sleeping at different hours all the time. My mom, stayed at home with my sister and I until we became more functional and she went back to work when we were teens.
My dad and I have always butt heads. We are both Cancers, although, he never seemed to get the emotional side of the crabby crab, just the moodiness. Some days you never knew what you would get. For my sister and I, sometimes we had to walk on egg shells. My dad hated his job and it was probably because he had to work constantly. He had a family to support so I know he felt that pressure. He was not around a lot but for me, I felt like we never really got to have have a connection. Do I love my father? Absolutely. He has helped me out in so many ways and I am so grateful. Did he ever take interest in me? Not so much and its ok, it was how he was raised as well. My grandparents, his parents, who are now deceased, never took a big role in my life or my sisters. When my sister was born they moved away. We didn’t see them much. As I got older and had my first child, that is when my grandmother took more of an interest in me. When I asked her about this, she told me it was because we didn’t have much in common. That hurt but I have since forgave but hard to forget.
My mom, a quiet Gemini, lost her whole family when I was young. Her mom, who was first battled with Alzheimer’s. This was very hard on my mom. Her brother, shortly after, who suffered years of issues with diabetes passed away. Finally, her father, although I am not certain, I believe he had cancer. He had moved into our home very briefly when he was ill. This all happen in maybe a 3 year span. I can’t imagine how hard this was on my mom. She didn’t cope well. She kept herself busy with housework never giving us any inkling that she was sad. Never did she talk about her feelings or emotions she was going through. She never led us to believe she was hurting. I was around 8 and my sister 10.
Both my parents, who I love dearly, never talked feelings, emotions, life situations. Did it teach me to be strong and handle whatever comes my way? You would think it did but absolutely did not. I wonder if I am extra sensitive and extra emotional because of it. Did god put me with these two people to teach them how to be more in touch with emotions and feeling? Perhaps but at almost 40 years old thing are still the same.
I had mentioned in another entry that we are transferring to another location. My parents, who currently live a mile away, have not been the best support. Both of them really have not talked about it. I finally broke down to my mom the other day to let her know I feel emotionally unsupported. They have not asked how I am doing with this all or have asked very little detail on the big change that will be coming. Instead, they pretend everything is ok, to put on a happy face and just not talk about it. My mom, who of course is so very upset that we are leaving, is very unhappy about it. She doesn’t know how to process this or handle this. What she knows is, pretend its ok and not talk about it. I hope after our talk, she will be more open with me. I don’t want to feel alone in this. I need to feel the emotional support from my family. My sister has been somewhat supportive but is equally unhappy.
My question is….Empaths, did you grow up in a similar household? Did you have emotional support surrounding you?
Thanks for reading the rambles. Much love. xo
Hotel Galvez
What a cool hotel. Hotel Galvez is located on Galveston Island in Texas. This building is amazingly beautiful but it is very haunted. My family went and stayed there for two nights. One of the ghost stories you will hear is of a woman who hung herself after she thought her fiance was lost at sea. Unfortunately, he was not and came back a few days after her tragedy. The room, 501, numerous sightings have been documented of seeing her apparition. We did not stay in this room but thought I would share a little background of the building.
My experience, as an empath, was definitely interesting, to say the least. Pulling up to this building you can just feel the energy. Once you walk in it almost hits you like a rock. So much energy in the building. It was just a lot to take in. Then, I really felt it. I became dizzy, lightheaded, weak in the knees and started to get a stomach ache almost immediately. Spirits are attracted to sensitive beings. I had a spirit attach to me but I didn’t know it just yet. Since I am still learning my abilities, I figured to go outside, get barefoot and walk in the grass. I need to get grounded. I took a walk in the grass and it did nothing. The hotel is right by the ocean so I figured I would try the sand next. Again, nothing and still feeling like shit. My husband getting a bit frustrated with me at this point, I asked him to just take the kids and go hit the boardwalk. I sent a message to my teacher. She says I have a spirit attached and to wipe around my head, get really mad and yell for it to get off me. After dealing with all these symptoms for over an hour, I listened to my teacher and within 10-15 mins, I was finally me again. It was pretty amazing. I wanted to have a experience while at this hotel and boy, did I get it. For the rest of the trip I was fine. I set my boundaries and demanded that no one else is to attach to me.
Thanks for reading. xo
Embracing Empath 